how dee do and a yohoho too. =)
the twit, baby, geek and babysitter welcome you.
Name: TurGor BaBoons
Nicknames: twit, geek, baby, babysitter
[ Life ]
sngs (secondary)
ELDDS, LADS
RJ, VJ, MLC
+ + + + +
[ info ]
we are all normal human beings
the geek and babysitter are hardworking
the twit and baby and hoplessly slackers
Tuesday, May 31, 2005
thoughts
wishes
it's a strange thing to be free after having such a hectic life for weeks. where has half the year gone? i dont even feel like ive accomplished anything yet. come back dear time! whatever happened to the days when we were still bonded with our OGs and we went to j8 to stone all day becos we had nothing to do?
now all of a sudden i have time in my hands and i'm alone and left with my thoughts. and it's a scary thing to be left with your thoughts sometimes especially when you havent had time to even look at the amount of pimples and freckles tt have popped for ages. the thoughts you have overwhelms you. and you dont know who to tell how you feel because everyone around you seems so busy and u cant bear to put an extra burden on them. so you keep it all to yourself, compiling it and holding it in, hoping you don't explode.
i think ive gotten stronger in rj. i dont cry anymore. at least i dont tear when my thoughts overwhelm me and i try to sieve through my emotions while wallowing in self pity. i dont know whether thats good or bad actually because crying is a form of escape. it helps you to get over things the easy way. as your tears flow out, so do your emotions and worries.
i sound like i'm heading for depression. sigh who cares. hardly anyone reads this thing anyway. look at the state of my tagboard. i wonder what has happened to all my st nicks friends. maybe its this cynical phase thing but i get the feeling tt none of them even remember me at all. all tt crap groups that we formed like the sexy 7 and my grandma and all seems to have faded into oblivion. im glad i still keep in contact with the geek. since we are going through the same phase and all.not the st nicks pple phase. another one. i do miss my friends and juniors very much. oh and charlotte and elaine. i forgot their birthdays which is sad really. sigh.
i just glanced over at the daisies on my table in a nice brown vase. they are sooo beautiful in their bright yellows and pinks and oranges. thank you all who gave me flowers for daisy even though half my time on stage (which is actually pathetically little) was spent skipping in, looking cute and skipping out. oh and thanks for the roses. i dont think ive ever gotten so many flowers before. plus minus 30! soooo many! haha considering i didnt tell a single friend to come! except samuel and mx and issy but in the end mx cldnt make it. :) call me a girly girl or bimbo but i LOVE flowers. they make me happy! so thank you all! thank you classmates who came down especially ivan and mango and lester (they gave me a flower!) and jeremy (he gave me a flower even though he didnt come!) and wan jun and so many more. and my three jnrs. and russell and wing yee and the 25ths and soooo many more pple! and thank you ivan for all your positive comments. :))))) and thank you samuel for actually coming! haha! im shocked enough!
crap i have chem make up tomolo and i havent touched a thing. in fact my pencil box is still in my school bag untouched. im pathetic really. only three weeks to mug xinling get that ass moving! sheesh. i need to go out. i need a study group. i need to be up to my eyes in work so tt i'll stop thinking silly thoughts tt wont help me in any way. i need a life.
+ [ moo ] r e m e m b e r again + 5:52 PM
i wish i can be contented with who i am and what i have
i wish i would appreciate my friends more
i wish i can listen attentively during lectures
i wish i will revise my work after every lecture
i wish i can read ahead of lectures
i wish i wasnt behind in every single subject
i wish my -----e would pay more attention to me and treat me better
i wish i wasnt so selfish
i wish i have more friends in rj
i wish i didnt feel so lonely sometimes
i wish i had more confidence in myself
i wish i would stop failing all my tests
i wish i was more capable and less wimpy
i wish i could contribute more to rp or council
i wish i can do so much more
i wish i will stop slacking all day and get down to some serious MUGGING
i wish i will stop thinking about i when there are billions of other people in the world
+ [ moo ] r e m e m b e r again + 5:37 PM
Monday, May 30, 2005
hols!
thanks twit for your encouraging post. haha. and all the best for your TEE i'm sure u'll do well i mean COME ON. u did well in spore so u'll obviously do well there!
life's been so hectic. i cldnt even spare a moment to blog. but now IT'S THE HOLIDAYS! and today is the first time in three weeks i get to take an afternoon nap. how blissful. i actually feel tt ive slept enough.i'm still sore abt not going for ccal camp though :( i wonder if they're back yet...
oh and i missed nj's investiture(due to gp common test) and dramafeste! i'm sore abt those too! ARGH i wanted to go so badly! why does my social life revolve arnd nj? so weird really... haha
ive whiled my whole afternoon away. i havent done anything since coming home after clearing props, costumes and what not in school. i figured everyone deserves a break so i reached home and watched what a girl wants for the upteenth time (yes yes its a chick flick i know i know! why am i always watching chick flicks?!) slept and ate and here i am! now tt dance night and daisy and invest are over i actually have time to focus on my studies which have fallen soooo far behind because of all those activities.i mean i reach home past ten everyday! what do u want me to do? and common tests are coming so i better start to FOCUS. instead of whiling my time away and blogging.
i wish my mom would stop forcing me to go shopping with her. im sorry but i lack her shopping genes and she'll just make me start flaring up at her for making me do smthing tt is such a pain in the donkey. i mean seriously. i know it's the sales but i really dont give a fart. and i know my sister's wedding is coming up and i need dresses but i already have got new dresses must i really go shopping for FAKE FLOWERS (like how do those even come in?!?!GOSH) to pin in my hair or on my dress and silly little things like that?plus i dont like these little frills much anyway. oh gosh i know i shld be a good daughter and like connect with her and discuss fashion and hair and what not but well something went wrong somewhere in my dna and i cant stand shopping. my female instincts just arent working in tt department. BUT i have learnt how to put on mascara! by myself! (zul had to do it for me last time. can u imagine?a guy helping a girl put on make up... im a sad case..) so im progressing. slowly but surely i am :D
oh gosh i realise tt ive got to focus on hssrp too.. that one's going down the drain really and ive signed an agreement to commit to it till wat april next year?but then again how am i supposed to commit to it if my toot of a mentor in nus isnt replying or even letting us know tt hes alive and breathing in some remotepart of our sunny island??? i bet hes hiding under his desk and refusing to read emails or pick up calls from any students cos he'll just be giving himself more work. well no one told him to mentor so many projects. hes just making life difficult for us because we have deadlines to meet and when school reopens life is gonna be hectic again!
oh gosh ive realised tt i am becoming more and more cynical and sarcastic in a genevieve sort of way. it's really bad. im no longer as sweet and kind as i used to be. and i am beginning to think tt i will never ever find a true and great friend in rj. i hope my st nicks friends still remember me... my class is still as blah as ever. i mean it's strange how i feel more alone then ever most of the time whenever im with them. in that sense im glad im in council. at least there is a group of people i can escape to. anyway. enough brooding. my studies are dead. i should be mugging. and maybe even skipping showering just like twit's friends.
but first... a little more tv. come one its only the first day back... and i havent watched tv for like 3 weeks! :)
+ [ moo ] r e m e m b e r again + 5:05 PM
Tuesday, May 10, 2005
cant breathe
oh god ive never dreaded a day more. tomolo morning meeting at 710. lit lecture test which i utterly dread cos i dont know a thing abt bloody frost at all and i am so dead u wont believe it. im so scared for the test i even want to feign sickness. i dont know what to do. im soooo doomed. and its almost 2am so im not left with a lot of options. then there is napha 2.4km. seeing how exhausted i already i am i doubt i will be able to run properly. please dont let it be terribly hot and sunny tomolo. i'll just die before completing my run. match support at 1pm. table tennis finals. dance night rehearsals until 10pm. investiture rehearsals which clashes with dance night rehearsals ends at 730pm. plus loads of tutorials (think bio and nair) due on wednesday. oh and ive got to get my campaign stuff out. OH MY GOSH AND CCAD PROPOSAL IS DUE LIKE -looks at clock. its 150am- YESTERDAY.
oh gosh if my whole week is gonna be like that im seriously gonna die. my heart is like in permanent stressed and tensed up mode and my brain throbs now and then. then my eyes get so heavy from exhaustion but i cant sleep cos i have so much work i dont dare too. im mentally exhausted but i cant sleep cos im so anxious and worried. have u ever felt tt way? i dont think ive felt tt way in a long long time. not even during os.
oh and theres an issue in school tt is affecting me cos its really horrible.
shyn lyn called me at 1145 to brief me till slightly past midnight on the changes to be made to dance night script. so now im slogging over it. i just finished. see? its never good to pick up her call. i feel my stomach clench everytime she calls me or when i see her in school. i actually run away in fear. lit test tomolo. ive been missing every single lit makeup due to council meetings. sigh. i dont wanna fail even though im so going to.
oh gosh i dont wanna go to school tomorrow. i dont want to face all of that. make me sick. make me sick. make me sick.
+ [ moo ] r e m e m b e r again + 1:42 AM
Wednesday, May 04, 2005
stop calling!
oh man im so pathetic. i dont dare to pick up my phone in case its the dance night stage manager calling to haunt me abt my emceeing script. hehe.
LOOK i have other work to do ok? after i clear more important stuff i'll do the script!I WILL do it.... EVENTUALLY! ok im pitying her. shes called me thrice already and ive just been ignoring it. in fact i dont know if it is her since i didnt store her number. haha..im just playing it safe.
ok why am i blogging when i have pi to edit and tests to study for and tutorials due? im sooooo wayyyyyy behind in my school work now even i cant believe it.
anyway i was feeling really terrible today cos i felt so useless. like i was doing so many things but im not good at any of them. i just want to be good at one thing and devote my all to it but apparently im just not good enough for anything... sigh.
anyway thank you samuel for being such a great friend, constantly fretting abt my life and studies more than i do. thank you for trying so hard to help me with my pi even though u had a headache. thank you meixian for coming online to try to help me when i was feeling desperate. thank you kat for replying my sms cos i was being daoed by everyone the whole night.(haha i just realised i didnt reply u!) thank you darling sister for helping me edit and shrink my pi when i was dying in front of the monitor from exhaustion. ure a god-send!
life's getting more hectic and hssrp is abt to start since my mentor is finally back... gahh.
+ [ moo ] r e m e m b e r again + 10:06 PM
x huilin
x karmun
x claire
x charlotte
x tiffany
x charmaine
x huishan
x beatrice
x pamela
x eddison
x gideon
x shi yun
x clara [KIDDO!]
x MEL
Script by: xDiorAngelx + Hotscipts.com
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